"I bought ice cream," Kate said as she stood in the open door of Zac's house. "I figured you could use it."
Zac laughed but he moved aside to let Kate into his house, "You've been bringing ice cream here every month. Always on the fucking fifth. It's been five months now. When will this stop?" he asked as he shut the door once Kate came inside. "Not that I'm complaining because I love ice cream."
"It will stop when you get over Carrick," Kate admitted as she lead the way into Zac's kitchen. "It's been five months today and I only bring ice cream over on the anniversary of your break up."
"I doubt I'll get over Carrick, not when he's constantly texting or calling," Zac said as he followed Kate into the kitchen.
Kate scrunched up her nose as she turned to face Zac, "I thought you told him to stop."
Shaking his head Zac blushed, "I can never tell him to stop," he confessed as they made it to the kitchen where Kate laid the plastic bag containing the carton of ice cream down. "Just like I can't tell him no when he wants a quick fuck."
"Tell me you didn't?" Kate asked and Zac swore he could hear judgement in her voice so he just looked down as he listened to her going around his kitchen and getting the bowls for their ice cream. "Zac he broke up with you because he wanted another man. He's dating someone else, the man he cheated on you with. You can't just keep fucking him every time the bastard he is with now won't let him get his dick wet."
Zac blushed and he hated to admit Kate was right, "But I love him and I know I fuck him better than August does and he wouldn't keep coming back to me if he didn't still love me," he reasoned as he sat down at the kitchen table.
Kate sighed loudly which made Zac look back up at her, to see her putting ice cream in both bowls, "He doesn't love you babe. If he loved you he wouldn't have left you for August, actually correction there, if he loved you he wouldn't have cheated on you with August and chose him when you gave him an ultimatum. Carrick just keeps coming back to you because he knows you're weak for him."
Again Zac blushed an even deeper red and as Kate came to the table with the ice cream Zac took his bowl from her, "But Carrick loved me at some point or we wouldn't have been together for seven years."
"Doesn't mean he loves you anymore though," Kate clarified as she sat down at the table beside Zac. "You need to stop letting him use you and move on, otherwise I'll be bringing you ice cream and helping you pity yourself until your ninety."
Zac laughed at that as he took a bite of his ice cream, "I don't need to pity myself tonight. Just got fucked by Carrick this morning so we're all good."
"Too much information Zachary," Kate scolded him playfully in between bites of her own ice cream. "Remind me why we are friends again?"
"Because no one else can handle me being an asshole who disregards their advice," Zac teased as he felt her swat his arm playfully.
Truth be told they were friends because at one point she had been his first girlfriend, before he had realized he was gay but then she had realized it first and she hadn't been surprised when at the age of twenty-one he broke off their engagement because he had, had an affair with his old best friend from high school.
Though that relationship had been short lived and it had lead to him meeting Carrick after it ended. It seemed in the end all things lead to Carrick even if in the end Carrick never wanted to stay like Zac wanted him too.
"You are right about you disregarding my advice though," Kate agreed finally breaking the silence that had enveloped the kitchen. "You're just going to get hurt by Carrick again when you do realize he only wants you for sexual needs and not love needs."
Zac took a few more bites of his ice cream as he shook his head, "He still loves me. I know he does," he reasoned though he refused to meet Kate's gaze. "Anyway, enough about me, how is wedding planning going?"
Kate rolled her eyes at Zac's words, "Your mom is driving me nuts but I guess that's what I get for marrying Taylor right?" she asked as she laughed. "And of course Natalie wants to be my matron of honor and all since she's the only one married but I mean I'm not close to her and she's married to Isaac and Taylor didn't really want Isaac at the wedding."
"Of course Taylor doesn't want Ike at the wedding," Zac replied knowing his brothers never got along. "Do I still need a date for your wedding?"
"Yes and Carrick isn't an option. I don't want him at my wedding," Kate said as she eyed Zac with a stern look. "I want someone new so you need to find someone."
Zac grumbled to himself slightly, "But I don't even know where to start Katie."
Looking at Zac, Kate pursed her lips, "Online. Online is good for dating," she nodded her head as she gave him a smile.
"I don't even want to date. I just want to win Carrick back," Zac spoke seeing Kate just shake her head.
It was after that they finished their ice cream in silence and Zac hated that it seemed Kate was judging him and that she couldn't just support him wanting Carrick back. Couldn't she see that he loved Carrick? He was gone for Carrick and Carrick had to love him back too because why would he keep coming back?
Zac refused to believe it was just because Carrick needed to get his dick wet or that he knew Zac was weak for him. It had to be because Carrick still loved him.
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Pouting as he stood behind the counter at the bar where he worked, Zac did his best not to shoot daggers at Carrick and August who had came in an hour ago with a bunch of their friends and were now having some kind of celebration or get together or something.
It was something Zac used to be a part of because all of the people here had at one time been Zac's friend until Carrick decided to choose August over him and then most of their mutual friends minus a few had all chosen Carrick over him.
"Hey Hanson," Brooklyn called breaking through Zac's thoughts. "It's your break time."
"You sure I can take one?" Zac asked curiously as he looked Brooklyn over.
Brooklyn nodded as she smiled at Zac, "It's not too crowded minus that group so I can handle my own."
Smiling back at Brooklyn, Zac left the comfort of the counter and headed outside to smoke. He just needed to get away from his ex and his ex's boyfriend who apparently wasn't good in bed but was good enough to still date.
Getting a cigarette out of his pack once he was outside, he put it to his lips and lit it up and it was during his first drag that he heard the door of the bar open and as he turned he came face to face with Carrick.
"Figured you'd be inside with your boyfriend," he replied harshly as he watched Carrick flinch.
Carrick looked down at the pavement, avoiding Zac's gaze, "I tried to talk them out of coming here but it's the only place we knew to celebrate."
"Celebrate?" Zac asked as he raised an eyebrow.
"August proposed," Carrick spoke as he finally looked up and he lifted his hand to show Zac the ring he wore on his ring finger.
Looking at the ring Zac felt like he was going to be sick to his stomach. He and Carrick had always talked marriage, Zac had even went out and bought a ring. A ring he still kept in his sock drawer but Carrick saying yes was a slap to him especially since just two days ago Carrick had been in his bedroom. "W..why did you say yes?"
Carrick laughed nervously as he shrugged his shoulders, "I love him."
"But you still fuck me," Zac reasoned as he stepped closer to Carrick.
"I do," Carrick nodded in response. "It's hard to let some old habits die Zac."
Zac took in Carrick's words and he took a few more drags off his cigarette in silence, "So I'm just a habit to you?" he asked harshly as he looked away from Carrick, feeling tears stinging his eyes. "I'm just a fucking habit! That's all I am after so many years."
"That's not....I didn't...." Carrick muttered obviously trying to correct himself but failing.
"No, that is what you meant," Zac spat as he shook his head. "I'm just your god damn habit and I'm easy," he spoke feeling like a broken child. Maybe Kate had been right. "You know I think Kate's right. It's time for me to move on and start dating again. Get you out of my system."
Carrick flushed at Zac's words but he didn't say anything as Zac finished smoking. It was only after when Zac was gonna head inside that Carrick grabbed a hold of Zac and pushed him against the side of the building.
Zac made a face as the concrete hurt his back some but he looked at Carrick expectantly. "What?" he asked when Carrick just stared at him.
"Don't move on," Carrick demanded as he locked eyes with Zac. "Please," he whispered before he leaned down and pressing his lips against Zac's.
Zac knew it was wrong but he kissed Carrick back, allowing his mouth to open when Carrick's tongue wanted entrance and their kissing became more frantic and heated. As if they were both searching for something, anything to hold onto.
When Carrick pulled away Zac looked up at him and sighed, "Do you love me?"
"I...I love him Zac but I still need you," Carrick spoke as he pulled away. "I need you and you can't move on."
As Carrick headed back inside Zac took several deep breaths because he could still taste Carrick's lips on him and he could still hear Carrick's words. Calling him a habit and then telling him not to move on and all because Carrick needed Zac.
Zac just closed his eyes sadly and sighed, knowing that he'd probably give in. He wouldn't move on because Carrick had asked him not too and he was weak for Carrick. He was weak and maybe being needed was enough since Carrick couldn't love him right now it seemed.
He was just fucking pathetic and he should just take Kate's advice but he loved Carrick too much.
Zac laughed but he moved aside to let Kate into his house, "You've been bringing ice cream here every month. Always on the fucking fifth. It's been five months now. When will this stop?" he asked as he shut the door once Kate came inside. "Not that I'm complaining because I love ice cream."
"It will stop when you get over Carrick," Kate admitted as she lead the way into Zac's kitchen. "It's been five months today and I only bring ice cream over on the anniversary of your break up."
"I doubt I'll get over Carrick, not when he's constantly texting or calling," Zac said as he followed Kate into the kitchen.
Kate scrunched up her nose as she turned to face Zac, "I thought you told him to stop."
Shaking his head Zac blushed, "I can never tell him to stop," he confessed as they made it to the kitchen where Kate laid the plastic bag containing the carton of ice cream down. "Just like I can't tell him no when he wants a quick fuck."
"Tell me you didn't?" Kate asked and Zac swore he could hear judgement in her voice so he just looked down as he listened to her going around his kitchen and getting the bowls for their ice cream. "Zac he broke up with you because he wanted another man. He's dating someone else, the man he cheated on you with. You can't just keep fucking him every time the bastard he is with now won't let him get his dick wet."
Zac blushed and he hated to admit Kate was right, "But I love him and I know I fuck him better than August does and he wouldn't keep coming back to me if he didn't still love me," he reasoned as he sat down at the kitchen table.
Kate sighed loudly which made Zac look back up at her, to see her putting ice cream in both bowls, "He doesn't love you babe. If he loved you he wouldn't have left you for August, actually correction there, if he loved you he wouldn't have cheated on you with August and chose him when you gave him an ultimatum. Carrick just keeps coming back to you because he knows you're weak for him."
Again Zac blushed an even deeper red and as Kate came to the table with the ice cream Zac took his bowl from her, "But Carrick loved me at some point or we wouldn't have been together for seven years."
"Doesn't mean he loves you anymore though," Kate clarified as she sat down at the table beside Zac. "You need to stop letting him use you and move on, otherwise I'll be bringing you ice cream and helping you pity yourself until your ninety."
Zac laughed at that as he took a bite of his ice cream, "I don't need to pity myself tonight. Just got fucked by Carrick this morning so we're all good."
"Too much information Zachary," Kate scolded him playfully in between bites of her own ice cream. "Remind me why we are friends again?"
"Because no one else can handle me being an asshole who disregards their advice," Zac teased as he felt her swat his arm playfully.
Truth be told they were friends because at one point she had been his first girlfriend, before he had realized he was gay but then she had realized it first and she hadn't been surprised when at the age of twenty-one he broke off their engagement because he had, had an affair with his old best friend from high school.
Though that relationship had been short lived and it had lead to him meeting Carrick after it ended. It seemed in the end all things lead to Carrick even if in the end Carrick never wanted to stay like Zac wanted him too.
"You are right about you disregarding my advice though," Kate agreed finally breaking the silence that had enveloped the kitchen. "You're just going to get hurt by Carrick again when you do realize he only wants you for sexual needs and not love needs."
Zac took a few more bites of his ice cream as he shook his head, "He still loves me. I know he does," he reasoned though he refused to meet Kate's gaze. "Anyway, enough about me, how is wedding planning going?"
Kate rolled her eyes at Zac's words, "Your mom is driving me nuts but I guess that's what I get for marrying Taylor right?" she asked as she laughed. "And of course Natalie wants to be my matron of honor and all since she's the only one married but I mean I'm not close to her and she's married to Isaac and Taylor didn't really want Isaac at the wedding."
"Of course Taylor doesn't want Ike at the wedding," Zac replied knowing his brothers never got along. "Do I still need a date for your wedding?"
"Yes and Carrick isn't an option. I don't want him at my wedding," Kate said as she eyed Zac with a stern look. "I want someone new so you need to find someone."
Zac grumbled to himself slightly, "But I don't even know where to start Katie."
Looking at Zac, Kate pursed her lips, "Online. Online is good for dating," she nodded her head as she gave him a smile.
"I don't even want to date. I just want to win Carrick back," Zac spoke seeing Kate just shake her head.
It was after that they finished their ice cream in silence and Zac hated that it seemed Kate was judging him and that she couldn't just support him wanting Carrick back. Couldn't she see that he loved Carrick? He was gone for Carrick and Carrick had to love him back too because why would he keep coming back?
Zac refused to believe it was just because Carrick needed to get his dick wet or that he knew Zac was weak for him. It had to be because Carrick still loved him.
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Pouting as he stood behind the counter at the bar where he worked, Zac did his best not to shoot daggers at Carrick and August who had came in an hour ago with a bunch of their friends and were now having some kind of celebration or get together or something.
It was something Zac used to be a part of because all of the people here had at one time been Zac's friend until Carrick decided to choose August over him and then most of their mutual friends minus a few had all chosen Carrick over him.
"Hey Hanson," Brooklyn called breaking through Zac's thoughts. "It's your break time."
"You sure I can take one?" Zac asked curiously as he looked Brooklyn over.
Brooklyn nodded as she smiled at Zac, "It's not too crowded minus that group so I can handle my own."
Smiling back at Brooklyn, Zac left the comfort of the counter and headed outside to smoke. He just needed to get away from his ex and his ex's boyfriend who apparently wasn't good in bed but was good enough to still date.
Getting a cigarette out of his pack once he was outside, he put it to his lips and lit it up and it was during his first drag that he heard the door of the bar open and as he turned he came face to face with Carrick.
"Figured you'd be inside with your boyfriend," he replied harshly as he watched Carrick flinch.
Carrick looked down at the pavement, avoiding Zac's gaze, "I tried to talk them out of coming here but it's the only place we knew to celebrate."
"Celebrate?" Zac asked as he raised an eyebrow.
"August proposed," Carrick spoke as he finally looked up and he lifted his hand to show Zac the ring he wore on his ring finger.
Looking at the ring Zac felt like he was going to be sick to his stomach. He and Carrick had always talked marriage, Zac had even went out and bought a ring. A ring he still kept in his sock drawer but Carrick saying yes was a slap to him especially since just two days ago Carrick had been in his bedroom. "W..why did you say yes?"
Carrick laughed nervously as he shrugged his shoulders, "I love him."
"But you still fuck me," Zac reasoned as he stepped closer to Carrick.
"I do," Carrick nodded in response. "It's hard to let some old habits die Zac."
Zac took in Carrick's words and he took a few more drags off his cigarette in silence, "So I'm just a habit to you?" he asked harshly as he looked away from Carrick, feeling tears stinging his eyes. "I'm just a fucking habit! That's all I am after so many years."
"That's not....I didn't...." Carrick muttered obviously trying to correct himself but failing.
"No, that is what you meant," Zac spat as he shook his head. "I'm just your god damn habit and I'm easy," he spoke feeling like a broken child. Maybe Kate had been right. "You know I think Kate's right. It's time for me to move on and start dating again. Get you out of my system."
Carrick flushed at Zac's words but he didn't say anything as Zac finished smoking. It was only after when Zac was gonna head inside that Carrick grabbed a hold of Zac and pushed him against the side of the building.
Zac made a face as the concrete hurt his back some but he looked at Carrick expectantly. "What?" he asked when Carrick just stared at him.
"Don't move on," Carrick demanded as he locked eyes with Zac. "Please," he whispered before he leaned down and pressing his lips against Zac's.
Zac knew it was wrong but he kissed Carrick back, allowing his mouth to open when Carrick's tongue wanted entrance and their kissing became more frantic and heated. As if they were both searching for something, anything to hold onto.
When Carrick pulled away Zac looked up at him and sighed, "Do you love me?"
"I...I love him Zac but I still need you," Carrick spoke as he pulled away. "I need you and you can't move on."
As Carrick headed back inside Zac took several deep breaths because he could still taste Carrick's lips on him and he could still hear Carrick's words. Calling him a habit and then telling him not to move on and all because Carrick needed Zac.
Zac just closed his eyes sadly and sighed, knowing that he'd probably give in. He wouldn't move on because Carrick had asked him not too and he was weak for Carrick. He was weak and maybe being needed was enough since Carrick couldn't love him right now it seemed.
He was just fucking pathetic and he should just take Kate's advice but he loved Carrick too much.
