The Past Is Just A Goodbye Chapter Eight
A few days after his confrontation with his mom, Zac was still having bad day, but they were slowly fading. He knew he had to be strong still for Cecily who was his responsibility now. He had to be the dad she deserved and needed. He had to make sure that from now on he did what was right because she needed that. She had already lost one dad and she wasn't going to lose him either, not to death or to depression.
"Come on Cess," Zac smiled as he picked Cecily up and carried her on his hip. They were at the cemetery visiting Taylor's grave. Zac figured it was the last thing they needed to do before going away. It was the last stop they had to make before their extended vacation.
Cecily wrapped her arms around her daddy Zac after he picked her up. Looking around at the cemetery as he walked through it, she laid her head on his shoulder. She wasn't exactly sure why they were here again. She knew they had came here not too long ago. Daddy Zac had said then it was so they could say goodbye to Daddy. Were they saying goodbye again?
"Daddy Zac?" Cecily asked as she kept her head on his shoulder. "Are we saying goodbye to Daddy again?"
Zac heard Cecily and he sighed as they arrived in front of Taylor's gravesite. "You could say that," he said as he put Cecily down but held onto her hand.
Looking at the headstone in front of him he couldn't help but frown as he read Taylor's name and date of birth and death. Sometimes this still felt like just one big old nightmare and that he would wake up in Taylor's arms again. He wished he could wake up in Taylor's arms again.
"Hey Tay," Zac smiled as he looked down some, moving his feet together some. He felt kind of weird, standing here, talking to a headstone. "It's me, Zac," he said feeling a lump form in his throat. "I have Cess with me. Mom finally gave up fighting for her. Apparently losing you made her come to her senses," he muttered rolling his eyes. "I wish she could have came to her senses before we lost you. I...umm...I just came by to say that Cess and I are leaving for awhile. You know me, once I get in a funk the best way to cure it is by leaving. I'm not sure how long we will be gone. I guess I didn't want you to think I had left you. I could never leave you," Zac whispered as he felt tears go down his cheek. "I love you baby," he sighed as he bent down and reached out to touch the stone. It was the closet he could get to ever touching Taylor again.
Cecily watched as her Daddy Zac bent down and touched the headstone, "Daddy Zac?" she asked as she stepped closer to him. "Are you okay?"
Zac looked at Cecily and smiled, "I'll be okay," he said as he reached out and pulled her into him. With her around he would be fine.
"Zac," A voice spoke and Zac turned his head to see Isaac standing there with his wife Nikki.
"I wasn't expecting you to be here," Zac said as he stood up and picked Cecily up again. Giving a polite smile to Nikki he then looked at Isaac. Zac wasn't sure if he was seeing things but he looked like he had aged in the last few days. Hell, maybe he himself looked the same.
Isaac shrugged at Zac's words, "Nik and I just came by to tell Taylor that we are expecting our first child," he shrugged. "We just found out yesterday."
Zac smiled again politely, "Congratulations," he said sincerely. Isaac may have been a prick to him before but Isaac was the only older brother had now. Zac figured it was best to just forget all the damage that had been done there.
"Thanks," Nikki answered as she reached down and put a hand on her still flat stomach. Looking between both brothers she chewed on her lip. "I think I will leave you two alone," she said as she walked away from them.
When Nikki walked off, Isaac just sighed and looked down, "I heard from Natalie yesterday as well," he said knowing the reason that Nikki had walked off was so that Isaac could tell Zac what Natalie had said.
"Oh?" Zac asked as he raised an eyebrow. Why the hell was Isaac telling him about Natalie? That woman had a heart of ice when she had cut Taylor out of Ezra's life. Zac wished she were the one who was six feet under right now.
Isaac nodded, "Yeah, she still keeps in contact with mom apparently. Mom told her that the results of the DNA test Taylor had to do when the first of the custody proceedings started came back," he said as he looked up and crossed his arms.
Hearing Isaac's words Zac couldn't help but be curious on if Isaac knew the results. "Do you know who her father is?" he asked as he looked down at the child in his arms. Cecily was now sleeping, something that Zac had been unaware of.
"Yes," Isaac said as he chewed on his lip.
"And?" Zac asked wanting to know who it was. Yes, he and Taylor had decided to never find out but Taylor was gone now. Taylor was gone and Zac wanted to know.
Isaac stopped chewing on his lip, surprised that Zac wanted to know who the father was, "Her father is Taylor," he said as he smiled down at the sleeping child in Zac's arms. "Taylor is the one whose sperm they used."
Zac couldn't help but smile some when Isaac said that Taylor was Cecily's father. It was the way it should have been. Taylor had always loved Cecily more than anything. It was only fair that she be his biologically.
"It's the way it should be," Zac said as he nodded. "I'm going to go now. I'm not sure when I'll see you again though."
"What do you mean?" Isaac asked not understanding what Zac meant. Why wasn't he sure when they would see each other again?
Zac took a deep breath before answering, "Because Cess and I are leaving town. I was planning on going to the house Taylor and I own in California," he said as he shrugged. "I figured she would love to spend Christmas at the beach and God knows I need to get away from here for awhile. I need to get better so I can be the best father for my daughter, for Taylor's daughter."
Isaac understood where Zac was coming from. Hell, if he were Zac, he would probably leave for awhile as well. "Have fun," Isaac said as he gave his younger brother a smile. He knew it was going to be awhile before Zac fully forgave him for the way things had been before Taylor's death but he hoped that things would get better now.
"Thanks," Zac said as he walked past Isaac and headed to his car. Getting there he opened the back door and gently put Cecily into her booster seat, trying not to wake her up. Once she was in and secure he got in the driver's side and started the car. When they got home he knew he would need to pack a few more things.
Yawning after packing everything that had been left, Zac turned and looked at the time. It read ten-thirty. It was late and he knew he had to get to bed, to prepare for the long day of traveling that tomorrow held. Standing from where he sat in the leaving room floor he walked down the hall and to the bedroom that was now just his. Closing the door, Zac walked over to the bed and laid down, his eyes falling to a picture on the nightstand. It was a picture he had decided to leave for when they came back.
Reaching out he picked it up and looked at it, It was Taylor holding Cecily when she was only a few hours old. He knew that being the only father she had now would be hard, but he had faith he could do it. He had faith he could be what she needed.
"I can do this Taylor," Zac said as he studied the picture some more. "I can take care of our daughter and I will make sure she knows about you. How much you loved her and how much you loved me," Zac smirked. "How we both wanted her to complete the little family we had. Even with you gone, she completes my little family. She is all I need right now. Thank you for giving her to me," Zac smiled before putting the picture back in place.
Turning the light off he closed his eyes and let sleep take him.
A few days after his confrontation with his mom, Zac was still having bad day, but they were slowly fading. He knew he had to be strong still for Cecily who was his responsibility now. He had to be the dad she deserved and needed. He had to make sure that from now on he did what was right because she needed that. She had already lost one dad and she wasn't going to lose him either, not to death or to depression.
"Come on Cess," Zac smiled as he picked Cecily up and carried her on his hip. They were at the cemetery visiting Taylor's grave. Zac figured it was the last thing they needed to do before going away. It was the last stop they had to make before their extended vacation.
Cecily wrapped her arms around her daddy Zac after he picked her up. Looking around at the cemetery as he walked through it, she laid her head on his shoulder. She wasn't exactly sure why they were here again. She knew they had came here not too long ago. Daddy Zac had said then it was so they could say goodbye to Daddy. Were they saying goodbye again?
"Daddy Zac?" Cecily asked as she kept her head on his shoulder. "Are we saying goodbye to Daddy again?"
Zac heard Cecily and he sighed as they arrived in front of Taylor's gravesite. "You could say that," he said as he put Cecily down but held onto her hand.
Looking at the headstone in front of him he couldn't help but frown as he read Taylor's name and date of birth and death. Sometimes this still felt like just one big old nightmare and that he would wake up in Taylor's arms again. He wished he could wake up in Taylor's arms again.
"Hey Tay," Zac smiled as he looked down some, moving his feet together some. He felt kind of weird, standing here, talking to a headstone. "It's me, Zac," he said feeling a lump form in his throat. "I have Cess with me. Mom finally gave up fighting for her. Apparently losing you made her come to her senses," he muttered rolling his eyes. "I wish she could have came to her senses before we lost you. I...umm...I just came by to say that Cess and I are leaving for awhile. You know me, once I get in a funk the best way to cure it is by leaving. I'm not sure how long we will be gone. I guess I didn't want you to think I had left you. I could never leave you," Zac whispered as he felt tears go down his cheek. "I love you baby," he sighed as he bent down and reached out to touch the stone. It was the closet he could get to ever touching Taylor again.
Cecily watched as her Daddy Zac bent down and touched the headstone, "Daddy Zac?" she asked as she stepped closer to him. "Are you okay?"
Zac looked at Cecily and smiled, "I'll be okay," he said as he reached out and pulled her into him. With her around he would be fine.
"Zac," A voice spoke and Zac turned his head to see Isaac standing there with his wife Nikki.
"I wasn't expecting you to be here," Zac said as he stood up and picked Cecily up again. Giving a polite smile to Nikki he then looked at Isaac. Zac wasn't sure if he was seeing things but he looked like he had aged in the last few days. Hell, maybe he himself looked the same.
Isaac shrugged at Zac's words, "Nik and I just came by to tell Taylor that we are expecting our first child," he shrugged. "We just found out yesterday."
Zac smiled again politely, "Congratulations," he said sincerely. Isaac may have been a prick to him before but Isaac was the only older brother had now. Zac figured it was best to just forget all the damage that had been done there.
"Thanks," Nikki answered as she reached down and put a hand on her still flat stomach. Looking between both brothers she chewed on her lip. "I think I will leave you two alone," she said as she walked away from them.
When Nikki walked off, Isaac just sighed and looked down, "I heard from Natalie yesterday as well," he said knowing the reason that Nikki had walked off was so that Isaac could tell Zac what Natalie had said.
"Oh?" Zac asked as he raised an eyebrow. Why the hell was Isaac telling him about Natalie? That woman had a heart of ice when she had cut Taylor out of Ezra's life. Zac wished she were the one who was six feet under right now.
Isaac nodded, "Yeah, she still keeps in contact with mom apparently. Mom told her that the results of the DNA test Taylor had to do when the first of the custody proceedings started came back," he said as he looked up and crossed his arms.
Hearing Isaac's words Zac couldn't help but be curious on if Isaac knew the results. "Do you know who her father is?" he asked as he looked down at the child in his arms. Cecily was now sleeping, something that Zac had been unaware of.
"Yes," Isaac said as he chewed on his lip.
"And?" Zac asked wanting to know who it was. Yes, he and Taylor had decided to never find out but Taylor was gone now. Taylor was gone and Zac wanted to know.
Isaac stopped chewing on his lip, surprised that Zac wanted to know who the father was, "Her father is Taylor," he said as he smiled down at the sleeping child in Zac's arms. "Taylor is the one whose sperm they used."
Zac couldn't help but smile some when Isaac said that Taylor was Cecily's father. It was the way it should have been. Taylor had always loved Cecily more than anything. It was only fair that she be his biologically.
"It's the way it should be," Zac said as he nodded. "I'm going to go now. I'm not sure when I'll see you again though."
"What do you mean?" Isaac asked not understanding what Zac meant. Why wasn't he sure when they would see each other again?
Zac took a deep breath before answering, "Because Cess and I are leaving town. I was planning on going to the house Taylor and I own in California," he said as he shrugged. "I figured she would love to spend Christmas at the beach and God knows I need to get away from here for awhile. I need to get better so I can be the best father for my daughter, for Taylor's daughter."
Isaac understood where Zac was coming from. Hell, if he were Zac, he would probably leave for awhile as well. "Have fun," Isaac said as he gave his younger brother a smile. He knew it was going to be awhile before Zac fully forgave him for the way things had been before Taylor's death but he hoped that things would get better now.
"Thanks," Zac said as he walked past Isaac and headed to his car. Getting there he opened the back door and gently put Cecily into her booster seat, trying not to wake her up. Once she was in and secure he got in the driver's side and started the car. When they got home he knew he would need to pack a few more things.
Yawning after packing everything that had been left, Zac turned and looked at the time. It read ten-thirty. It was late and he knew he had to get to bed, to prepare for the long day of traveling that tomorrow held. Standing from where he sat in the leaving room floor he walked down the hall and to the bedroom that was now just his. Closing the door, Zac walked over to the bed and laid down, his eyes falling to a picture on the nightstand. It was a picture he had decided to leave for when they came back.
Reaching out he picked it up and looked at it, It was Taylor holding Cecily when she was only a few hours old. He knew that being the only father she had now would be hard, but he had faith he could do it. He had faith he could be what she needed.
"I can do this Taylor," Zac said as he studied the picture some more. "I can take care of our daughter and I will make sure she knows about you. How much you loved her and how much you loved me," Zac smirked. "How we both wanted her to complete the little family we had. Even with you gone, she completes my little family. She is all I need right now. Thank you for giving her to me," Zac smiled before putting the picture back in place.
Turning the light off he closed his eyes and let sleep take him.
